BAKERSFIELD, Calif. (KGET) — At county fairs, you don’t just get a Twinkie.
You get a deep-fried Twinkie, covered in powdered sugar, drizzled with chocolate and caramel sauces, topped with whipped cream, accompanied by a giant mound of ice cream and, heck, why not, maybe a couple slices of candied bacon thrown in for good measure.
With fair food, too much is never enough.
That goes for savory dishes too.
At the Kern County Fair, which started Wednesday and runs through Oct. 1, it is possible to get a mere cheeseburger. But you can get that anytime.
Why not embrace excess and visit the Original Bratwurst stand to try the Diablo Burger?
The burger patty itself is of normal size; the devilish name is earned through the sheer amount of pickled jalapenos packed within, spicy sauces squirted on and the roasted jalapeno pinned on top.
The Original Bratwurst staff takes pride in its creations. I was able to watch as the burger was assembled, and I haven’t seen concentration so fierce since watching scientists create the bomb in “Oppenheimer.”
The final product is spicy, but manageable. It won’t land you in the emergency tent.
For a more refined meal, visit Lemoine Creperie, which offers a wide selection of sweet and savory crepes. I had one with chicken, pesto and plenty of mozzarella cheese that stretches about a foot with each bite.
This is for the fairgoer who doesn’t want their hands covered in grease or sauce. It can be tidily consumed with a knife and fork. All you need is space at a table, something in short supply at peak hours.
About half the booths appear to offer hot dogs, corn dogs, Polish dogs, bratwurst or some other variety of sausage. They’re filling, affordable, and can be easily devoured while walking the midway.
I decided on a Polish dog, thick and juicy. Did I want onions? Of course I did. They came in a massive heap, cooked to a wonderful softness and full of flavor from the grill.
For dessert, I briefly considered a sundae containing doughnuts, but, unusually for me, decided to keep it simple with vanilla soft serve in a waffle cone. Creamy and delicious, it was the perfect way to cap off the day.
I’ll visit the fair at least once more. The doughnut sundae can wait.